Well I’m on my way to Victoria, BC for the BC Tourism Industry Conference, which I can thank the Fort St. John Tourism Board for recommending me and the City of Fort St. John for paying the trip, but as the plane was taking off out of Fort St. John I thought about my fears.
As much as I hate to admit it, I have this weird fear of heights while still attached to the ground. No I’m not talking about your average ladder, I talking more about 90 story buildings in Chicago or the Tram in Jasper. Don’t ask me how I developed this fear and believe you me, I hate it. I think this fear is ridiculous. I know I’m perfectly safe and that many people a day go up and down buildings and trams, but for some reason I just can’t handle it. I don’t let my fear stop me, but I am hesitant. I know I just need to over come it by doing it more often, so I will. What I find interesting is how I am the total opposite when it comes to flying. I love it.
When we took off out of Fort St. John earlier today, I thought nothing of it. I was practically trying to stick my head out the window to see the city below me. There was no hesitation for me to jump on the plane and take off. I find this doubly interesting because in the last 4 months 2 (of many) people that I have had a previous encounters with have died to in plane crashes. I think about them and the others who lost there lives and I morn for them and their family, but it hasn’t stopped me from flying, nor enjoying it.
So as I sit here and type this, flying in the plane 30,000ft above the ground, and I compare the two. I have a fear of heights while still attached to the ground, but yet I have not heard of anyone dying this way, beside the obvious. Then I have my love for flying and complete comfort about it, but know that 2 or more people I have known have died from accidents. When I lay it out in words it still doesn’t make sense, but I thought I would share it.
I often try to explore ideas as to why I have these fears. Is it possibly because I building or tram can fly, they were never meant to be in the air. Am I overly relaxed about flying because in the back of my mind I know that planes were engineered to defy gravity?
One day I will understand this odd fear, but tell me, do you have any fears that you can’t explain?